Life is Messy

Last night I was called to the hospital to assist a C-section. I haven't been first assist in a surgery in over 10 years. It was fun – surgery is fascinating, from the organization and orchestration of it all to the privilege of seeing the inner workings of the human body. It was also challenging – I didn't always know how to best help the surgeon and I didn't have all the moves down (my non-dominant left hand had partially forgotten how to unclamp forceps, I wasn't always sure where to suction, etc.). The surgeon was one of my family physician co-workers, and he was nice about everything. He and I also discussed a few patients I've had recently that were challenging for me. I'm in my 40s now, so it's much easier to accept imperfection in myself – but in this profession it can be a head game trying not to perseverate over shortcomings.

I’m so far
away from my home
all out on my own.
Hang my tired eyes
on a clothesline in the sky. . .
Strong and stable
I’m capable
and my life
is still and yet haunted.

Those are lyrics from a song by Joy Kills Sorrow, a band I first heard today. Yup – “I'm capable . . . and yet.” And, “far away from my home”?   No kidding – for the past 17 years I've moved to a different state or country every one to three years. I also have "tired eyes" today – I've noticed that head colds require lots more sleep and coffee than they used to, one aspect of getting older that I don't appreciate. :-)

Except for one move back to St. Paul (where'd I'd lived for eight years just prior to all this craziness), all of my moves have involved making new friends and finding new communities. During these years of moving I have found great joy in following Jesus. My relationship with and understanding of Jesus have changed over the years, and I suspect will continue to do so.  Blogger Benjamin L.Corey posted today about some things that have been helpful to him as he left fundamentalism – which for him was a mental assent to Jesus plus some rules – and started to follow Jesus in a life-giving, life-changing way:

This isn’t a situation of “I used to like apples but now I prefer oranges.” Instead, when you have a paradigm shift within the Christian faith, it is more like: “I think I’ve misunderstood the beauty and complexity of apples. I am now going to begin a journey to discover a new and better way of understanding, appreciating, and enjoying apples“.

Yes!  See, I hear a lot about other gods that use the same name as Jesus.   The Jesus that will provide for everyone -- a job, the means to survive.  Stability, marriage, and kids -- you can have those, too.  But you know, I heard another Jesus say that in this world you will have trouble. I've learned not to buy into theology that isn't applicable for everyone, everywhere.  I'm trying to follow the Jesus who -- despite death being all around -- is the very author of life, the visible image of the invisible God, the one who says he'll give us rest and who calls us to imitate him in sacrificial love for others.

I've only recently (finally!) read Wendell Berry – he's a farmer, poet, activist, and fellow Jesus-follower. In his book Hannah Coulter, the protagonist says, “I began to trust the world again, not to give me what I wanted, for I saw that it could not be trusted to do that, but to give unforeseen goods and pleasures that I had not thought to want.” Indeed. Great literature and music, intellectual and character challenges, friends in unexpected places and times, a game of tag with children after a hard day's work – life is still messy and full of sorrow, but also beautiful and filled with joy.

More community stories!

In my last post I shared stories from the communities of Venbal, Birèl, and Derrière Garde.  Three other communities also sent representatives that same day to our meeting place in Bois de Laurence to tell their stories about the changes they've been a part of through Community Health Evangelism (CHE).  In this post I've added one brief story from each of these communities:  Lagwamit, Sylvestre, and Mapou.

Click on this link and scroll down to see Bois de Laurence, then zoom out to see where exactly these villages are located in northeastern Haiti.

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Soulvenie Succeda, community health evangelist in Lagwamit

Before CHE started we didn't have any training on hygiene or on lots of other topics.  Women died in childbirth.  Now not many women die, and children aren't sick very often.  There aren't so many cases of diarrhea.  We train the children, too, so that when they leave the latrine they wash their hands with soap and treated water so they don't get sick so often.

We also train people so that they don't get in fights on the street.  We say, “A village is a family.”  We should work together and get along.  We should help each other.  Neighbors used to not get along with other neighbors.  We did two or three trainings and people saw that what they were doing wasn't good, and now they don't fight anymore

Many of us started planting vegetables and we are much healthier now.  We started home vegetable gardens.  We invited everyone to plant, and 14 people decided to make a community garden – so we call our group “The 14 Organization.”

(c) copyright Soulvenie Succeda. Used with author's permission.

Davilus Montimer, trainer in Sylvestre

We started with CHE in 2003. When cholera came in 2010 we were really proud because we were able to teach others. As far as physical topics, we taught people to wash their hands before eating and after leaving the latrine. We taught people to drink treated water. We taught people to use better hygiene so that their children would have fewer parasites and less diarrhea. We taught them that every person should have a place where they go to the bathroom. We taught people about a spiritual life and gave people training so that they could walk with Christ.

So then, when cholera came, other organizations came in to train us. This is when we all felt proud, because when people came with the training they say that we already had all the information! No one involved in the CHE program died, thanks to God, thanks to the information everyone had.

Thanks to CHE. . .we have done perinatal training, and thanks to this we have fewer people die in childbirth.  Once I was in bed and I heard someone knocking at my door. It was someone coming to tell me that Madame Jiwani had abdominal pains. I asked when this started, and we found someone who had a bicycle and who could go get her. He put her in a truck and went to the hospital in Pignon. If she wouldn't have gotten there either she or the baby would have died. She always talks about CHE and says that it's thanks to CHE that she has her baby.

I went to a house where the people there didn't ever go to church. I took my Bible and went and tried to share some verses with them. I continued to talk about how Jesus loves us, John 3:16, he gives us hope. . . The woman of the house used to go out and sell things on Sundays, but now goes to church! . . She stays strong, she is continuing to follow God.

(c) copyright Davilus Montimer. Used with author's permission.

Junimode, trainer in Mapou

We were in darkness. We see CHE as a grace God gives to us, it is like cool water for us.

During the time cholera was ravaging the country, thanks to God we didn't lose a single person.  Mapou has become a beautiful mapou tree! [The community is named after the mapou tree.] We didn't know how to wash our hands, and the children played on the ground. Now when you see a child with a mango you'll hear someone shout: Hey, go wash that mango before eating it!

We had a problem with our road. We sat down together and we decided to come up with a plan to get there faster. No one from the outside helped us, we did it ourselves. Unfortunately, we weren't able to finish before the rainy season started. But thanks be to God, we began. We will get there.

(c) copyright Junimode. Used with author's permission.